When the Gray Lady interviews someone as cute as Jude Law, she doesn’t take off the kid gloves. If anything, she puts on an extra pair.
In a recent article here, before actually exchanging words with Gorgeous Jude, the New York Times provides a little back story, noting that last year poor Jude was loudly dissed at the Academy Awards by Chris Rock and also had to suffer through the agony of “a personal scandal involving Mr. Law’s fiancée, his ex-wife and his nanny [that] kept his name in the gossip columns for months to come.”
So what exactly did that “personal scandal” involve? Did Jude walk in on the threesome enjoying some steamy chick on chick on chick action? Not exactly. The Times somehow never gets around to telling us that Jude was cheating on his fiancée with the nanny who takes care of the three kids he had with his ex-wife, who learned of the situation when one of the kiddies informed her that daddy was humping the help. There’s also no discussion of the nude photos of Jude that surfaced, nor the fact that his less than Ron Jeremy sized schlong provoked derisive snickers among cock queens all around the world.*
No, the Times doesn’t ask Jude when, or if, he’s getting married, or who he’s humping, or if he’s embarrassed about the size of his dick. But they do give him a chance to piss on Chris Rock.** Sorry, Chris. You’re funny, but funny’s a long way from stunning.
*I feel for Jude on this one. Is there anything cheesier than laughing at a guy because he has a small dick? I figure God must love small penises, because he makes so many of them.
**The Times asks Jude “Any advice to the academy if it considers having Chris Rock be host for the Oscars again?” Jude’s response, “The proof’s in the pudding. If you can’t get Billy Crystal, then wait,” is a bit enigmatic, but I guess the point is that Chris Rock is no Billy Crystal.